A trip to the salon left our columnist in a panic when she realised her bank account was maxed out and left her counting the costs of some luxury birthday treats in the city. It’s a delicate balancing act!
• ‘OH dear, your card didn’t go through, pop it in there again for me!’
So chirped the cheery lady at the desk in a salon I visited in the city last week.
She probably thought it was just a little technical glitch although the sheer panic in my eyes probably gave the game away: yup, cash flow ‘issues’. I had been dying to try this salon for literally years so it was unfortunate that when I finally decided that I was worth it, my bank account had other ideas.
• Now, I’m not a complete dope and had obviously checked my bank balance in advance of my appointment, but I had just forgotten about one, or three, pesky direct debits that sort of cleaned me out as I sat nonchalantly in the chair being preened and primed.
Luckily I’m hardwired to have an emergency stash of cash in my bag or I’m not sure what would have happened (washing hair for the afternoon perhaps?), but it took the gloss off the experience and brought me back down to earth with a terrific bang.
I had planned for me and my new hair to have a little stylish sashay around town but instead I sloped back to the car with my tail between my legs, with further poking around in the deep recesses of my handbag to cover what seemed like extortionate car parking charges. My normal heart rate only returned when I turned the chip van corner in Innishannon.
• It can’t be just be me, though, can it? Everything suddenly seems so dear. Shocking altogether! Frightening! You’d want to be printing it, as the fella says!
Admittedly, most of the time I’ve no idea of the cost involved to produce/deliver what I’m declaring to be so expensive but it makes me feel better just to say it anyway. And I must fess up too that some of my current financial embarrassment is entirely of my own doing.
• I had kept a tight hold on the purse strings for the past while and then I sort of loosened it, and then just let go entirely. It’s a bit like Pringles, once you pop/tap you just can’t stop. There were more than a few unnecessary purchases: an air fryer (yes readers, I should have bought one years ago when I first starting writing about it and it’s as life-changing as promised); a gorgeous diffuser (that makes the house smell like a spa ... or at least masks the smell of the air fryer) and a steam cleaner (a brilliant bad boy to clean the air fryer and anything else in my way).
Then I had my phone fiasco that I wrote about last week, a dentist trip, and some other unexpected bills (that may or may not have included a fancy facial for my birthday) and before I knew it, I was cleaned out (but everything else was spotless and nicely scented).
• As I pondered my situation I was reminded of some wise words from my straight-talking dad who used to get quite frustrated about my ‘loose’ attitude to money when I was younger. If ever I started moaning about my lack of financial security, he’d remind me: ‘It’s quite simple: if you want to have more money, you need to earn more, or just spend less.’
In recent weeks, having trialled the reverse of that (earn less and spend more), I think he was definitely onto something.
• I should point out that I’ve recently I have taken a little step back from the world of industry and commerce, and I’m still getting used to my reduced spending power. So is my husband. More than once I’ve had to ask him for a little financial top-up here and there. He can see me coming a mile off.
• The phone calls where I need a little dig-out go like this: ‘Hey hon, how’s your day going? What time might you be home? Oh you poor thing, that’s tough. I’ll have a nice dinner ready. Listen, if get a chance at some point would you pop XX into my account please? Any time in the next five minutes would be super. Amazing. I’ll explain later. Byeeeeee!’. Phone calls where I don’t need a top up: ‘Hi; when will you be home? Can you manage any earlier? Have you had your dinner? I think there’s some leftovers from last night.’
• To make things more challenging, I’ve an annual girly weekend coming up soon. I’ve known these gals for over 30 years but you know yourself, you still want to look well. The look I had been planning was something like the Olsen twins (only older) or Diane Keaton (only younger), you know, channelling a sort of ‘quiet luxury’ or ‘rich mom vibes’ as it’s been coined (think lots of cashmere, gold accessories and lightly tanned skin).
That could be a little bit tricky now to pull off given my current circumstances. My smallie’s post office savings book is calling me teasingly but I’ll resist (for now). Let’s just say no one can accuse me of not reusing, rewearing and recycling!
• And I know Valentine’s Day is behind us (much love to you all!), but if you’re still in the zone I strongly recommend watching One Day on Netflix. It’s hard to explain how appealing it is, and it’s definitely the best thing I’ve seen in ages. It’s a serialised drama remake of the novel by David Nicholls, with 14 episodes of around half an hour making them perfect for pre bed-time viewing. I’m savouring them slowly as I don’t want it to end.
I’ve also been enjoying some other things that don’t cost anything like the sound of new-born calves, daffodils, the longer evenings, and the midterm break. No school lunches for a few days – bliss. There are some things money can’t buy and for everything else ... wait, can you still get MasterCard?
Emma Connolly is hoping to perfect a look that is like Diane Keaton (but younger!).
And the Olsen twins (but older!).
