A SKIBBEREEN man who hit rock bottom when he was in the grips of addiction has launched a new movement to help men connect in places outside of the pub.
Andrew Desmond has set up ‘Be Undeniable’ which has started with morning group workouts, and will go on to include weekly group talk support sessions.
Andrew (50) is now 16 years sober but said from the minute he picked a drink at the age of 17 he was a ‘fall down drunk.’
He studied civil engineering in what was formerly CIT, and afterwards spent time fishing on trawlers.
Andrew, who is married to Oliva and dad to Archie, wants to repay support he’s received from others.
‘I always drank to excess in college and while I couldn’t drink every day when I was fishing, I’d binge drink and could go missing for days at a time,’ he recalled.
At the age of 24 he entered addiction centre Tabor Lodge and with the support of AA, he was sober for a few years.
‘I moved to Cork city, I had a job in sales and it was a really amazing time,’ he said.
Unfortunately, Andrew substituted his alcohol addiction with gambling, and also spent the following years ‘on and off’ alcohol.
‘In lots of instances I felt like I was ‘less,’ but drinking was something I excelled at,’ said Andrew, who routinely consumed up to 20 pints in a session.
At the age of 34, he had got a second drink driving conviction, and hitting ‘rock bottom’ he realised things couldn’t continue.
With the help of AA, he has turned his life around, got really into fitness over the past few years and runs a popular Airbnb called Little Black Shack in Church Cross.
Now he wants to help other men – not those who are recovering from addiction, but all men.
He launched ‘Be Undeniable’ and has put out an open invite to early-morning workouts he hosts at the astroturf in Skibbereen Sports Centre.
‘I’m not a personal trainer or a nutritionist but I’ve put out the invite to say that I’ll be training at this time and people are welcome to come along. I feel that men bond better through an activity and the workout is tailored to everyone, and all fitness levels,’ he said.
Andrew stressed that men don’t need to be in turmoil to come along.
‘The benefits of moving are amazing regardless, and movement in the morning will set people up for the day. As well as the benefit of fitness, there’s friendship on offer, and business support. A lot of men would fear failure and keep their ideas and problems in their head, but here’s a chance to get support and exchange numbers,’ he said.
The workout lasts 20 minutes, with an opportunity for a chat over a coffee afterwards.
‘Everyone will be in their car by 7.10am to get on with their day,’ he said.
Going forward, Andrew, who is married to Oliva and dad to seven-year-old Archie, will facilitate a support group that will follow a set format.
He recognises how people helped him, and now he wants to form a community to help others.
‘The idea is still evolving but I’ll offer one-on-one mentoring, I’ve heard a thousand stories and I’ll listen without judgement. It will be an outlet for men, and we’ll host BBQs and family hikes, and that sort of thing.’
Andrew said the title ‘Be Undeniable’ is about being ‘your authentic self, and showing up for yourself.’
He hopes his blueprint will be replicated in other areas too.
‘I’m not conceited, and I’d love to see other facilitators take my idea and run with it,’ he said.
‘It’s still a case of one day at a time for me but I’m a different person now than I was and I don’t associate with that way of life, with drinking any more.
‘Before I couldn’t have thought of anything better than spending a day in the pub, now I couldn’t think of anything worse,’ he said.
‘Life now is amazing,’ said Andrew.
• Workouts take place in the Skibbereen Sports Club astro on Mon, Wed and Fri mornings at 6.30am. Follow Andrew Desmond on FB and Instagram for more.
